Delusions of Insignificance

What is our life’s true meaning?
What is our story from the beginning?
We seek more then cameos in a forgotten small play
More than a butterfly effect of things we do and say
We seek a legacy of glorious grander
Of heroism in midst of terrifying danger

But this story isn’t ours.
Not our stage Not our hour
God weaves His message in tapestry of time
And in it we are woven as threads so fine
Our stories woven same as Paul or Saul or Cain
All showing God’s glorious love all the same

Would God in His wisdom so divine
Created insignificance or something benign
Then die for it on the cross for all history to see
To give true purpose and to set you completely free
So see your purpose not as the world does
See it in your creator’s loving eyes

July 7

Song: Unravelled

Running out of dreams
Few worked out it seems

> Lord unravel me
> Till you find my core my soul
> Make me whole again
> Fill me with new hope

Fighting demons of my past
Escaping regrets doesn’t last

> Lord unravel me
> Till you find my core my soul
> Make me whole again
> Let forgiveness rain

Fearing what tomorrow brings
Body falling breaking seams

> Lord unravel me
> Till you find my core my soul
> Make me whole again
> Heal my body and faith

Restored I now stand
Not fearing the end
In faith

> Lord unraveled me
> Restored my core my soul
> Made me whole again
> and I praise you Lord

March 7, 2014

Two mannas

Living dollar by dollar and day by day
With little as safety for what comes tomorrow
Reliant on God and living in faith
Finding God’s joy in the presence of sorrow

I wonder why Christ in His mighty grace
Does not provide us with dreams of this world
So everyday I must seek his holy face
To live another day till I grow very old

And when I compare my tired long life
To ancient saints living on a barren land
It was this dependance that grew their faith
And tested it with scorching dry sand

And what would befall without such a trial
The ancient saints would remain as slaves
To life of corruption, pride, and God denial
We too may as well dig our graves

Yet you have prevented such a fall
You have provided till the very end
Manna as food to nourish them all
Manna as faith of your sovereign hand  

July 11, 2014

Second Life

An old age brings a new understanding
Awareness of frailty and life’s ultimate ending
But also wisdom of how we think and feel
And what is of value and what is real

Our bodies begin to fail already
But our emotions more balanced and steady
We can now choose how to live again
This second life is not loss but gain

Letting go of what controlled us
Forgiving those who wronged against us
Living anew with new hope and meaning
Old life dies and new life is beginning

Feb. 13, 2014

Song: Compass

Please excuse my education
It was no divine creation
It’s no accident that I now vent
My mind is bent and I am spent

What is my new situation
I don’t want no speculation
Truth I seek no matter how bleak
I may be a freak but I’m not weak

Everything is common my friend
We live and die… to no end
No purpose, no home, no morality
Just food sleep sex and insanity
Nothing is sacred. Nothing is holy.
This world is but dirt and folly
Life is what I choose it
I use it and abuse it

God is not here. He’s on vacation.
I live for family friends and my vocation.
Life not hurting others is my motto.
My dream is winning a big lotto.
I want to retire and be happy.
Until then I’m in therapy.
Give me a phone. I’m all alone.
I’m born and then I’m gone.

The earth is precious and so am I
We gotta change or kiss goodbye
‘Cause the world will end tomorrow
Life with no meaning is a sorrow
I tried saving those in need
But I retreat when I bleed
My society is my morality
Life’s frailty is my reality

I’ve been changed and freed
From sin, pride, and greed
Saved by holy awesome God
Paid for by his own blood
I spend my life to discover
He is my only true lover
Look inside me and clearly see
I want to be who He made me to be

This is my moral compass.
Given by God to all of us.
All is holy. All is sacred.
Intentionally divinely created.

Everything has meaning
From back to the beginning
Without compass we’re lost
Without God we’re just dust

Last update Aug. 30

Star passed too quickly

The following poem was written as a eulogy for my brother Roman who died suddenly in Nov. 2012.
The poem was translated into Polish by his son Chris.

On Gods blue sky canvas / Na niebieskej scenerii Boga
a star was born one day / Urodzila sie gwiazda, nocy pewnej
one among millions of millions / W srod milionow, jedna
but special in many ways / Ale ze stronami wspanialymi, iloscia wielka

It wasn’t the brightest / Najjasniejsza byla, nie
It wasn’t the greatest / Najwieksza, tez nie
But to so many of us / Ale dla wszystkich nas
It was so precious / Drogocenna bardzo, byla

Sometimes it brightened our night / Naszej nocy swiatlem, czasami byla
Sometimes it helped on out way / Naszej drogi pomoca, tez
Sometimes it just made us wonder / Pokazywala, wspominala
How life is not easy today / Jak trudne zycie czasami jest

Yet one night it disappeared / Lecz pewnej nocy, znikla ona
Suddenly without any warning / Niespodziewanie, bardzo
And I still don’t understand / I wciaz nie rozumiem
Why it happened so quickly / Dlaczego los ten, spotkal ja

Oh God why did you rob us / Oh Stworco, dlaczego gwiazdke ta
of this bright star so quickly? / Ukradles z wzroku naszego, z taka predkoscia
Or maybe its just fate that took him / Przeznaczenie mozliwie, ukradlo ja
And God is here to help us today / Jesus jest tutaj z nami, aby pomoc nam

This star we will not forget / Zapomnimy te gwiazdke, nie.
It will live in our hearts forever / W sercach naszych, zyc wiecznie bedzie
But one thing I know right now / Ale rzeczy pewien, dzis jestem
Tonight the sky lost its shine / Tej nocy niebo stracilo blaskosci

Dec. 4, 2012

I am sacred

Two lives we do not lead
Two faces we do not need
Just one all-sacred me to be
In faith, to God, clean, and free

written on Aug. 30, 2012


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